Oh there is a world here
Q: How do you escape from the noise?
Mitali’s Dialogue
Hope, optimism, sadness, disappointment, hurt, resentment - I went through a full gamut of emotions this past week. Partly from what was happening in the country I call home but mostly because of the events happening in my own home. As I named these emotions triggered by actions of my family members, I noticed myself getting stuck in a familiar pattern of thinking.
“Our senses act as pathways to our mind.” I heard Alice Waters say this on a podcast recently and it made me pause. Could I use my senses to change the pathways of thinking in my mind? She was talking about how technology is causing us to lose touch with our senses but in stark contrast I realized that I was starting to relying more on my senses. While my senses can often be overstimulated, putting my brain in overdrive, over the past few months I have been using my senses to calm my brain down.
The habit that brings me into my senses immediately is walking. I recently upped my movement habit to walking every day instead of three times a week. Nature is an escape for me and I am lucky that it is easily accessible in California. I can step out of my front door and immediately admire the changing colors of the leaves on the trees. Or on a walk around the block I can take the time to notice the new blooms on the shrubs.
On a morning walk, I tune into the sound of the birds chirping in the marshland. It feels like they are communicating the joy of a new day or maybe it’s just the nutritious food they are foraging in the mud. I watch the great white pelicans glide low over the water with their long wings outstretched, landing in a colony of a hundred white pelicans on a small patch of grassland. Five brown pelicans soar overhead in a synchronized V formation landing close by but seeming to be outliers to the white ones.
I walk without headphones taking in the noises around me and delighting in the play of the birds. Flocks soaring into the sky. Ducks, geese, willets, egrets, sandpipers, sparrows, finches - eating, swimming, sleeping, flying in their groups. Occasionally the lone gull or raven appears. A red-tailed hawk seems to sit motionless for me.
Being here, observing nature, taking in my fill of sight and sound - the birds with their morning rituals, their aerial dances and their camaraderie as they chirped to each other - takes me out of my mind. I stop wondering if I have love or despairing about not feeling love from others and instead turn to nature to show me her beauty, her love, her joy. My thoughts stop racing, my breath slows down and I behold the true joy that can be found in what nature creates for us.
“Everyone is educated in their own unique way and those of us who had the privilege of attending college are very often the least educated in regards to understanding that we are not just connected to nature, we are nature. To not know that is to be disconnected from our power source.”
- Andrea Gibson, author, Things That Don’t Suck
Can we open our eyes and drink in the beauty that surrounds us? Is this how Mother Nature shows her love to me? Through the sounds of the birds, the colors of the leaves and wisps of clouds in the blue sky. I just need to breathe and step away from the thoughts that my mind continues to churn up. My mind is not doing me any favors by allowing me to wallow in dissatisfaction. Think abundant Mitali, not scarce. There is much for the Universe to offer me if I stop focusing on my unmet wants and instead wait for It to provide for me.
Stop wasting your energy
getting caught up in your mind.
How many times have you said
that the mind leads you astray?
Stop falling into this trap
time and again.
Distance yourself
from your mind
and your thoughts.
Be aware
that it isn't you
but your mind that is struggling.
Observe it, name it,
be entertained by it,
but do not succumb to it.
Because, oh there is a world here
waiting for you to discover it.
Kinnari’s Dialogue
Last week I was having dinner with a close friend visiting from London. I hadn’t seen him in a couple years so there was lots to catch up on. He’d had an intense few years between starting and selling a company while raising three kids. I asked him if he was thinking about taking a break in 2025. His response shocked me. “Not really. It’s harder to take time off when you live in a city. What would I do? I can’t think of anything I want to do.” I offered my opinion - “How about doing nothing? Maybe that’s what you need. Time to just be and do nothing.” We went through this interchange a couple times - me nudging and him pushing back. Finally he admitted that he worried about his mental health if he suddenly had a lot of time with nothing to do. This was coming from the same eccentric, super cool, fun friend that used to chide me for taking my laptop home when I worked in the London office back in 2010. He used to say “Kinnari, Europeans don’t take laptops home over the weekend. We like to turn off and enjoy life.” I reminded him of this, of who he used to be when I first got to know him. He was both surprised and thankful at this recollection.
This week it was a similar story. I was catching up with two girlfriends who are busy moms to young kids and have stressful tech jobs. We were having a conversation about whether we’d thought of a number - a number that would make us feel okay to quit corporate life and spend more time on other projects. One of them said “Yes, my partner and I have talked about it. We are five years out. But honestly I don’t know what I would do with all that time.” I brought up my point about spending time being, about engaging in activities and pursuing projects that were more fulfilling. Both the women smiled. One of them said “I’m sure you are right. But I am a doer, I like doing, being productive.”
Yesterday when Mitali shared a draft of her post I responded with “Well it’s good but I think it’s hard to access for those readers that are swamped with the demands of work and raising kids.” And to my surprise, it wasn’t my friends I was referencing but myself. I used to be able to escape for a walk to the Golden Gate Park at least once or twice a week. I am typically someone that tunes into nature often, stops to smell the roses and watch the birds. So why exactly was I finding it harder to relate to her post about “the world out here” today? I realized that I too was getting caught between the demands of work and school events for the kindergartner in addition to suffering from a lack of sleep with the baby toddler constantly waking up in the middle of the night.
I hadn’t stepped out for a long walk in nature in a while. So I made a decision - to take my 2 pm meeting by phone instead of video. I drove to the Baylands Nature Preserve which is only ten minutes away from where we live now and dialed in after starting my walk. I was rewarded with expansive views of the sky, mountains in the background and cool air on my skin. In the distance I saw a flash of white. Upon walking closer I discovered about 40-50 great white pelicans taking a break and relaxing.
I spent more than half of the walk on the phone. But the fifteen minutes that I got to walk alone got me out of my head. I was able to feel awe for a bit. Those forty minutes made a big difference to my day. I came back home feeling a bit more energized, a bit more positive.
Later that day, I got to marvel at the magnificence of the maple tree outside our front door with little A after she got back from school . How lovely it was to watch Fall work its magic in our own front yard!
Love this!